Let me start by saying something that most relationship articles won't. Long distance relationships are brutal. Not "oh, I miss you" cute brutal. Actually, genuinely hard. The kind of hard where you cry in a grocery store because you see their favorite cereal. The kind where you have a terrible day and the person you want to hug is 800 miles away. The kind where people keep telling you it won't work, and some nights you almost believe them.
But you're still here. You're still trying. And the fact that you're looking up date ideas to keep the connection alive says more about your relationship than a hundred easy, same city dates ever could.
So here's what I've got. Not the generic "watch a movie together on video chat" advice that every other article gives you (though we'll cover that too, because sometimes it works). These are ideas designed to make the distance feel a little shorter. To create shared experiences even when you can't share the same room. To remind both of you why this impossible thing you're doing is worth it.
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Analyse My RelationshipVirtual Dates That Actually Feel Like Dates
1. Cook the same meal together over video. Pick a recipe. Both of you buy the ingredients. Set up your phones in the kitchen and cook at the same time. Eat "together" at the table. It's not the same as being there, nothing is, but the parallel experience creates a closeness that just talking doesn't. You're doing something, not just saying something.
2. Online game night. And not just casual mobile games. Get into something real. Stardew Valley co op (you're literally building a farm together), Overcooked (you will yell at each other and it's great), or any online board game platform. Competition and collaboration both work because they give you something to react to together in real time.
3. Virtual museum tour. Major museums offer free online tours. Walk through the Louvre together on your screens. Talk about what catches your eye. It's more engaging than it sounds, especially if you both have opinions about art, which you will once you start looking.
4. Book club for two. Read the same book on the same timeline. Discuss it every few days. You're sharing a mental experience even when you can't share a physical one. And you learn a lot about someone by how they interpret a story. What character they relate to. What themes stick with them.
5. Online workout together. Follow the same YouTube workout on a video call. It's goofy, you'll both be out of breath and sweaty and unable to talk properly, and that's exactly why it works. Doing hard things together, even through a screen, builds something.
6. Virtual wine or coffee tasting. Order the same wines or specialty coffees to each other's addresses. Open them at the same time. Rate them. Develop a shared vocabulary for what you like. "Remember that weird Ethiopian blend we both hated?" Inside jokes from 1,000 miles apart. That's the stuff.
7. Watch party with commentary. Use a sync watching service so your movie plays at the same time. But the rule is: keep your microphones on. React together. Pause to discuss. Make fun of the plot holes. The movie is just a vehicle for interaction, not the point itself.
8. Take an online class together. Learn a language. Take a photography course. Do a creative writing workshop. Having shared homework sounds lame and is actually incredible. You're growing in the same direction even from different zip codes.
9. Play 20 questions, the real version. Not the guessing game. Actually ask 20 meaningful questions you've never asked before. LoveCheck has question sets specifically designed for couples who want to go deeper, and they work especially well for long distance because they give you structured ways to connect when the casual everyday stuff isn't available to you.
10. Spotify listening session. Create a playlist for each other. Listen at the same time. Send voice messages after each song about why you chose it or how it made you feel. Music communicates things that words can't, especially when you're trying to say "I'm thinking about you" for the 400th time and need a new way to express it.
Surprise and Delivery Dates
11. Send each other a care package. Not Amazon. A real, handmade package with things that mean something. A hoodie that smells like you. Snacks from your city. A handwritten letter. Photos you printed. A small object that references an inside joke. The effort is the message.
12. Order each other dinner. Find a restaurant near them on a delivery app. Order what you think they'd love. Eat your own delivery at the same time on video. You're choosing for each other, which is both a gamble and a gesture of "I know you."
13. Send a letter (actual mail). In a world of instant communication, a letter that takes three days to arrive carries weight that a text never will. Write about what you're feeling. What you remember. What you're looking forward to. They'll keep it in a drawer for years. I promise.
14. Surprise flower or gift delivery. On a random Tuesday. Not a birthday. Not an anniversary. A random, unremarkable day that you decided to make remarkable. The spontaneity matters more than what you send.
15. Plan their perfect day from afar. Coordinate with their friends or roommates if possible. Book them a massage, have coffee delivered in the morning, send them a playlist for the afternoon. Show them that distance doesn't stop you from taking care of them.
Building a Shared Life from a Distance
This is the part that most long distance advice ignores. The logistical dates. The ones that aren't romantic in a movie scene way but are deeply romantic in a "we're building something real" way.
16. Apartment or house hunt together. If you're working toward closing the distance, do the research side by side. Browse listings on a video call. Dream about neighborhoods. This isn't just date night, it's evidence that the distance is temporary. That there's a plan.
17. Budget planning date. I know, I know. But if you're saving for visits or eventually moving, sitting down together and looking at the money makes it feel real. It turns abstract "someday" into concrete "by this date." That shift is powerful.
18. Create a shared photo album or journal. Use Google Photos or a shared Notes document. Add to it daily. Pictures of what you saw, thoughts you had, funny things that happened. It becomes a living document of your relationship that you're building in real time, together.
19. Plan your next visit together. In obsessive detail. Every meal, every activity, every lazy morning. The planning itself is a date. Anticipation is a form of presence. When you're mapping out the itinerary together, you're both there, mentally, in that future moment. And that counts.
20. Share your daily routines on video. Not just talking about your day. Actually show each other. "This is my walk to work." "This is the coffee shop I sit in." "This is my view right now." The mundane details are what long distance strips away, and they're exactly what intimacy is made of.
Creative Connection Ideas
21. Start a collaborative playlist that grows over time. Each of you adds one song a day. Don't discuss the additions. Just listen. Over weeks, the playlist becomes a soundtrack of your relationship's emotional landscape. Songs added during a fight sound different from songs added after a great conversation.
22. Draw or paint each other over video. Set a timer for 20 minutes. Use whatever materials you have. Show the results. They will be terrible and you will cherish them. There's vulnerability in letting someone see your bad art.
23. Write a story together. One paragraph at a time, alternating. It can be fiction, science fiction, romance, absurdist comedy, whatever. The story itself doesn't matter. The creative collaboration does.
24. Send each other voice memos throughout the day. Not texts. Voice. Hearing someone's tone, their laugh, the background noise of their life. It's the closest thing to being there. Some couples treat this like a running conversation that unfolds over hours. It's intimate in a way texting will never be.
25. Countdown calendar. Make physical countdown calendars that you both cross off each day until the next visit. Share a photo of the updated calendar each morning. Watching the number shrink is genuinely motivating on the hard days.
For When You Need Something Light
26. Would you rather, couples edition. The silly version. The deep version. The slightly inappropriate version. These games work beautifully over text or video because they give you structured fun when you're both tired but want to connect.
27. Two truths and a lie about your week. Make it a weekly ritual. Each of you shares three things from the week and the other guesses which one is fake. It's a playful way to catch each other up and it forces you to pay attention to the details of each other's lives.
28. Virtual karaoke. There are apps that let you sing together in real time. Or just pull up the same karaoke video and go for it. You will both sound terrible through laptop speakers and it will be the most fun you've had on a call in weeks.
29. Take the same personality quiz at the same time. Love languages, Enneagram, even a Buzzfeed "what kind of bread are you" quiz. Discuss the results. Argue about accuracy. Learn something you didn't expect.
30. Have a "bad day" protocol. This isn't a date exactly, but it matters more than dates. Agree on what each of you needs when things are rough. Maybe it's a 10 minute call with no pressure to be interesting. Maybe it's a specific comfort show you watch in sync. Maybe it's just a text that says "I'm here." Knowing the protocol exists makes the hard days more survivable.
The Emotional Truth About Long Distance
Look. I can give you 30 date ideas and all of them will help. But the thing that actually sustains a long distance relationship isn't activities. It's intentionality.
You have to choose each other deliberately, over and over, in the absence of physical presence. There's no accidental bonding in long distance. No casual couch cuddling that maintains closeness without effort. Every moment of connection is an active choice. And that's exhausting, but it's also kind of beautiful.
The couples who make long distance work aren't the ones with the most creative date ideas. They're the ones who show up consistently. Who call even when they're tired. Who send the random Tuesday text. Who talk about the hard stuff, the jealousy, the loneliness, the fear that this might not work, instead of pretending everything is fine.
If you want a tool that helps facilitate those deeper conversations, LoveCheck has question prompts specifically designed to help couples talk about the stuff that actually matters. Not just "how was your day" but "what are you afraid to tell me" and "what do you need from me that you're not getting." Those conversations aren't fun. But they're the difference between a long distance relationship that survives and one that thrives.
You're doing one of the hardest things in love. The fact that you're here, reading this, trying to make it work, trying to keep the spark alive across miles and time zones, that tells me something. It tells me you're serious. And serious people figure it out.
The distance is temporary. What you're building is not.